So, it is over.
There is nothing between us. No need for explaination, no need talking, no need seeing each other. Nothing.
One part of my heart, part of my soul will be forever lost.
It is painful to see him, it is painful to look at him and anything related to him makes me feel sick.
Yes, there is nothing in between black and white.
You have them all, or you lose them all. That is my theory.
All the fucking broken heart songs make perfect sense.
That all I am having now is the lingering fuck pain.
The mental pain becomes physical one... People definitely under-estimated loneliness, broken heart feelings.
They are awful...
And they wear me out.
Continuously hitting on my throat, my heart, my vein, my muscle...
Every pain is so fresh, so new, so hard.
He is the way he is, the one who is afraid of responsibilities and relation, the one who build up the image of good and kind and helpful and lovely man. But he will run away when people give him the huge duty, the huge responsibility, to have their lives inside his hand. He scares of hurting the others, so he hurts me now.
Fucking fake friendship never works in any case.
I must hate him to be his friend, so simplier, spit on my love to build up the friendship.
How can you be a friend of the one you love with all your heart and soul, overcome the love you love yourself, your pride, your esteem?
If you can, you are a loser, arent you?
I don't want the half-way thing, any half-way thing.
I put the huge trust and hope in him.
And seems like it turns out that I was wrong.
The same way I tried my best to protect a slutty girl... Just because I trust in her, and never knew the truth...
I will do awful things, if I keep being fake. I will explore and hurt people.
And I don't want to release that monster.
She is so wild, she is so awful, she is so powerful and fucking strong enough to swallow me...
Who am I now...? Nothing but a shitty messy hole of garbage...
I need a cave... to hide...
Or I need a hand, to hold?
There is nothing between us. No need for explaination, no need talking, no need seeing each other. Nothing.
One part of my heart, part of my soul will be forever lost.
It is painful to see him, it is painful to look at him and anything related to him makes me feel sick.
Yes, there is nothing in between black and white.
You have them all, or you lose them all. That is my theory.
All the fucking broken heart songs make perfect sense.
That all I am having now is the lingering fuck pain.
The mental pain becomes physical one... People definitely under-estimated loneliness, broken heart feelings.
They are awful...
And they wear me out.
Continuously hitting on my throat, my heart, my vein, my muscle...
Every pain is so fresh, so new, so hard.
He is the way he is, the one who is afraid of responsibilities and relation, the one who build up the image of good and kind and helpful and lovely man. But he will run away when people give him the huge duty, the huge responsibility, to have their lives inside his hand. He scares of hurting the others, so he hurts me now.
Fucking fake friendship never works in any case.
I must hate him to be his friend, so simplier, spit on my love to build up the friendship.
How can you be a friend of the one you love with all your heart and soul, overcome the love you love yourself, your pride, your esteem?
If you can, you are a loser, arent you?
I don't want the half-way thing, any half-way thing.
I put the huge trust and hope in him.
And seems like it turns out that I was wrong.
The same way I tried my best to protect a slutty girl... Just because I trust in her, and never knew the truth...
I will do awful things, if I keep being fake. I will explore and hurt people.
And I don't want to release that monster.
She is so wild, she is so awful, she is so powerful and fucking strong enough to swallow me...
Who am I now...? Nothing but a shitty messy hole of garbage...
I need a cave... to hide...
Or I need a hand, to hold?
